Friday, August 11, 2006

The Debut



In a move that many will later consider inevitable, the messageboard gangsterisms, taught prose and lethal wit of the illest post-star in teh board universe has started his own venue of ego stroking. Yes the Arenas Is God board has finally been birthed. Not to be confused with the fannn-tastic "Gilbert's Arena," this borderline homo Gilbert shrine will feature more of me, cuz thats what you want to read, no? (don't answer that). BTW, I am going to try my best to stay away from the parenthesis, but damn if I don't have another under the breath comment to toss in there right?! Watch as the venerable AIG turtle-waxes poetically and stuff about the rap and the wiz and the skins and the like. It would be similar to his myspace blog, which has not quite caused the innernet to go nuts, but has left a few ripples of weirdness floating around your top eights and bulletin boards. So let us begin this fun, wild trip with some inside analysis! (WORD!?)
Isiah Thomas just hand-delivered the wizards their best move of the season.

Hating on Isiah has become so passe on the web that it is slated to have its own fucking VH1 Special. But this move looks pretty damn spectacular over here. Why not have Isiah, showing what looks like an almost pedophillic allegiance to a fellow Hoosier (Jared says he's been down with Zeke since he was 14, when the pursed lips were just simply a duck-face) drop the entire Mid-Level-Exception on a dude whose career high is 18? Ernie couldn't have asked for a better outcome. To get saddled with another Etan contract would have been like locking up Juwan Howard for Jordan money. I could care less about the effect this deal will have on the Knicks. The Knicks suck and will continue to suck until they lose those two terrible point guards, Mr. Terror Squad video and the Don of Sligo Creek. Jared's addition will do little, much like his addition to the wiz. Lest us forget, Awvee, "Miami Vice'd" Storee filled in quite admirably for Jared's enormous dome and varying degrees of hilarious facial hair. No this move was spectacular for the wizards because it opened about 20 more doors that needed to be cracked a lil. How about bringing in DeShawn Stevenson for absolutely nothing at all?

Now with the potential of starting next to the 'gawd, this dude, who deleriously punked Gerald Wallace last year, ought to have a career year (yeah I said it). So much for those 6 points a game. Now maybe if Gilber dishes to his left, he will have someone who could possibly knock down a jumper! And if fouled, said person could go 2 of 2 from the line! Amazing. If all of this awesomeness wasn't enough, this dude plays the defense. THE DEFENSE. Why didn't Zeke toss five mil his way? His former agent damn sure didn't help out DeSteve's cause, convincing the young former High School bust to opt out of a cushy contract, turn down a much sweeter deal, just so he could sign for the veterans min! Hows that for representation!

Posted by Arenas Is God @ 4:28 PM